As of today, I’m exactly two years post-grad. In December of 2017, I graduated from Ball State University in Muncie, IN with a degree in photojournalism. I’ve written this blog post a few times & deleted because I’m not sure how to structure my feelings of the last two years into words. If you asked me on December 16th, 2017 what I wanted to be doing two years from then, I’d probably tell you living out in Arizona with my high school sweetheart & pursuing photography full-time. The wildest part of it all is that’s exactly what I’m doing. I currently reside in Tempe, Arizona with Brannon, my boyfriend of almost 9 years, & I’m working on being a full-time wedding photographer.
With such a big move comes a lot of change. I’d like to not sugarcoat it & act like everything is all sunshine & unicorns because it’s not. I’ve realized that life after college often comes with a lack of clear milestones. Up until this point, what my life was leading up to always had a clear finish line. Whether it was moving on from elementary school to middle school, middle school to high school, high school to college & ultimately getting a degree from college - there was always a set plan in place, that no matter what the process was like or how hard it was to get there, you had a goal you wear reaching for. I’ve contemplated if that’s why getting engaged & then married & eventually having kids is looked at as the new “milestones of life” once you hit a certain age. So when you’re living a not-so-typical life compared to others, you yourself can contemplate what you define as the important moments.
Obviously I can set my own goals now whether it is personal or within my business, but with being self-employed, it’s sometimes a weird line to walk of always creating your own tasks to complete just to feel satisfied with the job you’re doing. I think it’s often a daunting job, being your own boss & realizing that if what you’re pursuing doesn’t work out it’s purely on you, no one else. After leaving Indiana, I was also leaving a clientele that I had been building up for nearly 3 years & moving to a big city where I knew no one. I often feel unsuccessful in my career, especially in 2019. I was used to being constantly busy & having every day filled with photoshoots. I’ve had to dive into a different side of my business over the past 1.5 years to really figure out what I want to be doing & who I am as a photographer. I have to remind myself that living busy does not define your worth. In a current world that glorifies hustle culture, it can make working from home & spending hours reading marketing information & designing a website look not so glamorous. Every day I feel overwhelmed with the idea that I’m not sure if I’ll make it in this business. I read the statistics for how hard it is to truly run your own photography business & then when I look at the numbers of how many photographers there are in the Phoenix-metro area alone, how will I ever stay afloat?
I keep rolling with the punches though. Whenever there’s a low point, eventually there usually is a high. I ride that wave as long as I can - to stay motivated & tell myself that there’s nothing else I’d rather be doing. Because there’s really not. This is what I’m meant to be doing. I may not always be traveling to a destination or have my weekends fully booked, but what’s that saying about how Rome wasn’t built in a day? I think that applies here.
So here I am, exactly two years since I walked across the stage at Worthen Arena to get my diploma. I’m pursuing the career I’ve always dreamed of, living with the love of my life & I can see mountains from my bedroom window. So if you asked me ten years ago where I’d think I’d be at this point in my life, I could have only dreamed that this is what I’d be doing. So I’m going to ride on that wave for now & keep chasing this current adventure.
Check out my blog post from two years ago here.
Samantha Rose Photography is an elopement & wedding photographer based in Phoenix, Arizona. When she’s not capturing people in love she can be found wandering the Desert Botanical Garden, eating pizza, or listening to the podcast Crime Junkies.